Here guyz.... The lOng anticipated moments. It took me by own's breath away to write this and try not to get caught in the story. I hope this would be the heart of this story so far
Chapter 11 & 12. Done
"Aex, can we talk?"
One evening Mew with Aex as they are having dinner in the town. Aex doen't reply, just look itno him in the eyes.
"What is it, Mew?"
"Something happen to Tong, something bad..."
Aex begin to sense that this conversation has something to do with their relationship.
"I heard from Aunt Sunee, Tong is rehab centre..."
"What happen? Is he ... On drugs?"
"Yes... I think Tong might have the need of me, to ..."
Mew want to carry on with his words, but get stucks to see Aex's sad expression beneath his smile. Mew know, this will be the hard competition between Aex and Tong. Mew is sad to see how Aex would handle the fact.
"It's allright Mew, visit him, I'm sure he needs you right now"
Aex tries to be dilomatic, but he feels himself helpless, he knows that deep inside Mew's heart, he still loves Tong more than him and is about to lose Mew bit by bit.
"If you need me, we can go together, Mew"
"That would be nice if you want... Aex... I ...."
Mew lost his words, knowing what Aex would feel
"Aex, sorry for this..."
Is the only words what Mew can manage to speak out.
"It's okay, Mew... It's all right with me, I'll stand strong"
For the rest of the day, Mew can't think straight, he tries to keep his commitment to Aex, but deeply touched by Tongs suffering. He knows, he has hinted Aex that he will always love Tong, but he also has given hope to Aex. Now, he has to choose who he will let go. If he let go Tong, this will crush Tong, but if he choose Tong, Aex will be hurt. Mew doesn't want to have all that happen. Some way he wished he didn't give Aex hope, if he knew this would happen
Not long after that, Ying as always drops by Mew. As always Mew tells her most of the thing. Ying has trasnformed herself into more mature girl, able to keep her mouth, become her friends favorite to get around. She in Mew situation take the blame for herself for have encourage Mew to take on Aex. Mew quickly dismiss the tought, since the decision is made on Mew's consideration. But the two of them know that Mew got to go back to Tong.
The next day, Mew contact Sunee, arrange the visit. The visit is then arranged two days after. That two days just bring Mew to his anxoius...
At the day, Sunee, alongside with Mew, Aex and Ying make the visit. As they enter the rehab centre, Mew's heart tremble, thinking that Tong suffers this much just for him. He doesn't know whether this is flattering or devestating. As they see the doctor, they are told that Tong's physical condition is progressing, but the psychological condition suffers a void, due to his unfullfilled wish. Mew know what Tong needs exactly.
As they walk along the lane, Mew become agitated, Aex tries to calm him down, although Aex began to fear that his worst thought he has always keep in the corner in his mind.
They then reach the room. The doctor tell them that Tong is having sleep. At the click sound of the door handler, Mew seems to jump in his heart. They enter the room, and indeed, Tong is sleeping. Mew's can barely keep his tears upon seeing a thinner, paler Tong, far from Tong who has always been his guard, the one who has always protected him. Now he become the person Mew got to guard, the person Mew needs to protect. Slowly Mew's tears melt, come down the cheek. He keep standing still, not able to move even the slightest of his body. Aex knows what that means. Ying is suprised and somehow feels guilty for her favour towars Aex when she and Mew had the talk that time.
Sunee slowly approach Tong, walks gently to his bed. She keeps a look at Tong, touch his right arm. Tong slowly awake
Her soft voice slowly wakes Tong.
Tong reply, doesn't take notice of Mew and Aex, his eyes keep staring at his mom.
"You have visit"
Tong look around, and there, his other half still looking at him with his eyes gotten already red.
Said tong faintly.
Mew can't hold it any more, he begins to weep, sobbing, while Tong, after having gone through dark hours finally have Mew this time just in person, no fatamorgana, no nirvana, just Mew in full flesh and blood. Tong can't hold his emotion, he starts to cry.
"Mew... Is it you?"
Tong barely can hold his tears, knowing he now doesn't need all those drugs to be with Mew, now standing in real in the front of him.
"Tong... Here I am..."
Mew goes slowly approaching Tong, within meters, Tong reach his hands, so weak, wants to feel his Mew. Mew responds, reach his hand to Tong. Their finger touch each other. As if there were a huge electrical current flows through their body, they melts, the sobbing getting louder, they just let go every bit of their emotion, they don't care how many person inside the room, they claim each other just with one single language: language of love... And that love envelopes them so tight, leaves no room anymore for doubt.
Mew halfway reach at Tong's face from the height, wants to kiss him, but he just manage to kiss Tong's forehead in the midst of Mew's heavy cry, makes Mew's body shakes heavily. Tong, for the first time since years, touched by Mew, hugs him so tight with all power still left in his weakened body, is losing himself, sobbing, crying at height of his emotion, utmost happy to feel, to touch, to have Mew, now in his very presence, alive, breathing for him. The sight is heartbreaking for those who see this view, Sunee, Aex and Ying
It breaks Sunee's heart to see their love still holds through all the distance and through all obstacles. She now believe Tong's love for Mew is indeed real. Now her yes to Tong become a genuine yes for two of them. Her doubt and her prejudice falls upon the sight of them.
It was too much for Aex too bear. In his mind, in his eyes he has already lost Mew. Now, he get the full version of Mew's answer:
"Yes, Mew still love Tong, not him."
That breaks his heart.
Ying for the first time see that same sex love between Mew and Tong is indeed real, goes beyond sexual attraction. Ying has understood their love, but hasn't seen this kind of deep affection. Ying too, is moved to tears to see their suffering all these years.
They let their emotion go down a bit, regain back controll, talk and empty chats, and after that they parted to let Tong continue his therapy.
Back in the car, Sunee talks to Mew:
"Mew, thank you for having brought back my Tong..."
Said Sunee with shaken voice. Aex stars to feel unfitted in the situation. Sunee drop them at Mew's house, and the rest of the day become very silent between them. Ying this time is still moved, not able to lighten up the atmosphere as she usually does.
Now, it is the point of no return for Aex. He has seen the naked truth, Tong is still Mew's greatest love. Aex consciously let Mew alone at first, to let Mew take care of Tong, and also to prepare himself for the big desicion for their relationship. As clear as the answer may seems, Aex heart chills to see their relationship is going to end, anytime soon.
Mew, take some time to be alone, Ying prediction has come out to be true, Tong has never let him go, Tong would chase him, even if he has to go through hell. It moves his heart, but he doesn't know how to talk with Aex. For him Aex is too pure to be thrown away like this. He has suffered too much to deserve his love.
Several days, after rehersal and gathering song material in the studio, Aex ask Mew to have a conversation at Mew's home. After they're ready Aex then starts:
"Mew, now I see everything clear about you and Tong"
Mew can't answer, he is still shaken. He looks at Aex in his eyes
"Sorry Aex, sorry...I really don't know that this could go like this"
Aex wait a while, he knows now how he shall do
"Mew, I now have the answer..."
Mew gets enigmated
"Once I ask you who you love... Now I know who you truely love"
Mew is not able to respond, he feels a deep guilt in his heart.
"Aex, I'm sorry to have hurt your feeling"
Is what Mew manage to say.
"Don't be Mew, the first time I declare my love for you, you have already told me you still love him. It's on my risk to love you, as secondary love for you"
"Aex, I don't want you to feel that way, I want..."
Aex makes the sign for Mew to hold his words,
"I know from the beginning, I will compete against him, even that didn't discourage me to love you. I didn't give up on you because my feelings for you is true."
Mew is all over himself after all this.
"It is clear now that you are much needed by him"
"Aex, how about you? I don't want to hurt your heart..."
"No Mew, you have let me love you, even if only for a brief time, it is enough for me..."
Aex's eyes begin to gets red
"I want you to do something for me..."
Mew still lost his words
"I want you to go back to him. He needs you more than me, the answer can't get more clearer, you do still love him... HE NEEDS YOU MORE THAN I DO"
"Aex, I tried so hard not to feel you as second love"
"I've known the fact long ago. It's all right with me"
"I will hurt you now if I did that"
"Part of my biggest love for you is... To let you be happy... If you're happy with Tong, that would makes me happy to see you happy"
"Aex, I can't do that... You're too good to be treated this way"
"No, Mew, I know what I'm doing. I will be fine."
Aex waited a bit
"Mew, thank you for your love, for have let me love you is the most beautifull things ever to happen to me. I will always love you and wish for your happiness with ..."
Aex can't go on. He cries... He has no other alternative, he has seen the truth. Mew reach Aex and hug him... They are sad for they know it would be the last time they share the time as lover, share the happiness, the joy, laughter.
Upon discussion with them separately, Ying has no other advise, she knows from beginning, Tong has never let Mew alone, he has his reason why all the absence, the waiting. She slso saw, how Tong desparately chase Mew, not able to lose him, she got confused too as Mew about to take Aex, said she no, Mew hold himself too deep in the misery, had she said yes, Tong won't get chill with this.